As usual, you won’t find those cliched materials—that’s what the internet’s for. Materials in this second installment are even fresher, funnier and, as usual, short and straight to the punchline.  

Tom Willis, the fellow who is capable of the sublime in one minute and pure foolery in that very same minute, is back.

You also get to meet our new doctor, the one who took the hypocritical oat and likes to make a meal of everything.

There are great quotes to motivate and inspire you. 

Although this is not the go-to book for aspiring clowns, you can rest assured that the contents of this book will breathe new life into your speeches, tweets, writings, etc. 

This book is ideal for young adults, proper adults, and the age-is-just-a-number crew.


  • Love all, but trust only dogs.
  • Better to remain silent and be thought a fool only than to speak and reveal the mouth odor as well.
  • PATIENT: I am tired of living with this bad breath. DOCTOR: In that case, hold your breath.
  • My psychologist says I’m not of a sound mind, but the problem is…I can’t remember muffling it.
  • Although mummies are from Egypt, dummies are from everywhere.
  • Don’t show bias: treat fools, idiots, and nincompoops equally. After all, they are all equally useless.
  • Once, a computer beat me at chess. Next time, I came fully prepared—with the right screwdrivers.
  • TOM’s FRIEND: (whining) Shipping cost has almost doubled within the last 5 years. Why? TOM: Yes, that because the universe is expanding.
  • Wisdom: knowing when you are right, and when others are.
  • Taxation: the system of keeping citizens alive and healthy enough to work and pay taxes.
  • What money can’t buy; enough money hasn’t been offered yet.
  • My family was so poor…we rarely had enough to eat, never mind renting an apartment in the slums.
  • TOM’S FRIEND: There’s this designer shirt that costs 1,500 dollars; it requires no washing, pressing, doesn’t get wet, and has a fantastic fragrance. TOM: And it has the money-back option in case of theft?
  • While some jokes get selected into halls of fame, others get elected into public offices.
  • When a man kisses and tells, you can be sure of one thing: he isn’t a one-minute man.
  • What a man can do, a woman can make him do it better.
  • All women are beautiful; however, many appear less beautiful with makeup.
  • While some are plain useless, others you should use less.
  • A study has revealed that only 20 percent of married men cheat—the rest just won’t admit it.

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1001 One-Liners and Short Jokes

They’re all here in this classic collection of the most hilarious one-liners on planet Earth!  This eye-watering compilation has been carefully selected to get your giggle glands going and is guaranteed to give you hours of laughter and enjoyment.  Each of the 1001 gags has been placed into its own category such as Addictions, Religion, Women so you can find a joke easily on any number of topics.  A wise sage once said, “Laughter is, and will always be, the best form of therapy” so go on, cheer yourself up with this fabulous collection of mirth and merriment.

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